Hold Me, Thrill Me, Kiss Me, Kill Me
by Sparkly Daleks
Summary: The Doctor and Romana through the years. Title comes from the U2 song.


Hold me...

The creature is running towards them, claws outstretched.

'Doctor!' yells Romana. 'Do something!'

The thing gets closer and she clutches at him, holding him close. She's terrified, too terrified to even care that she's hugging the Doctor.

Something arcs over her head and there's a clang against the floor behind the creature. It stops and turns around, before running in the opposite direction, towards whatever the Doctor threw over its head.

'There,' grins the Doctor. 'Volmingoes are just like sabre toothed dogs. And all dogs love bones.'

He looks down at the top of her head and says gently, 'You can stop hugging me now, Romana.'

Romana immediately drops her arms from around him and steps away with an indignant huff. 'I was not hugging you, Doctor. It was an involuntary reaction to terror. I shall make a point of not doing it again. It's most undignified.'

She walks off back to the TARDIS, boots clomping on the ground.

'I wasn't complaining,' says the Doctor quietly, wide-eyed as he stares after her. 'You can hug me any time you like.'

***

Thrill me...

'Today was fun, wasn't it?' asks the Doctor, once they're safely in the TARDIS.

'Oh, yes,' agrees Romana as she takes off her coat. She's in her second regeneration now and the Doctor likes this more cheerful version better than her haughty, first incarnation. 'Thrilling. I'm sure all the adrenaline is good for the blood.'

'Of course,' the Doctor says and grins. 'Life with me is always an adventure, Romana.'

'Oh, I know,' says Romana. There's a pause. Quite a long pause. A pause in which both occupants of the TARDIS's hearts beat quite a bit faster than usual.

'But it does make your feet hurt, all that running,' Romana adds. She sits down and takes off her shoes, wincing as she rubs her feet.

Somehow it wasn't quite what the Doctor expected her to say.

***

Kiss me...

He's in his eighth body now, but she's still in her second. She looks the same, yet she's older, wiser. She's the president of Gallifrey and he's the same old traveller, red-haired and Victorian this time.

She summons him to Gallifrey and he finds she's in the middle of a crisis. The Daleks are attacking and she doesn't know what to do. She whirls around her office, robes swirling around her as she shouts and curses and makes threats against the Daleks. Every so often she'll sketch up a battle plan, then find it useless and throw it across the room. Her nails dig into her palms and the Doctor can't help noticing that they're bitten and ragged, not perfectly manicured as they used to be.

She is very different to the student he first met many years ago.

'Can't you do something?' Romana asks, turning on him now. He leans casually in the doorframe watching her with a mix of concern and amusement. 'That's why I brought you here! Can't you do anything? Anything at all?'

The Doctor's silence is enough of an answer for her.

'Rassilon!' She slams her hands down on her desk, eyes blazing. 'This is all going wrong! I mean –'

She's been saying the same thing for the past hour and he can't take it anymore. In three quick strides he's at her desk and has grabbed her by the shoulders, stopping her frantic pacing.

He sees her mouth open to question his actions and takes it as his cue. He presses his mouth to hers, kissing her urgently, frantically, across the desk. Not only to get her to shut up, but to reassure her. And maybe just because he wants to.

Romana pulls away first. 'That was hardly proper.' Her tone is accusing but her eyes say something else. 'That was not at all appropriate, in fact. I could have you arrested.'

He looks at her unflinching. 'Yes, you could.'

She grabs his lapels and pulls his mouth to hers. It's full of passion and frustration and anger and fear and many more emotions too complicated to even have a name.

It's not as all proper, as Romana said. But neither of them cares.

***

Kill me...

The Daleks are attacking. Gallifrey burns.

He looks at the machine in front of him. Can he do it? Can he really do it?

He closes his eyes and presses the button. Immediately there's an angry tremor through the TARDIS. Fire burns everywhere, even his mind, as he spins away.

But just before he passes out, he has time to think through the fire.

He's killed them all.

And he's killed Romana.


End file.
